Who - Me? An Alcoholic? Not Me!  2/6/12

 



Who exactly   is the type of person who becomes an addict or alcoholic?  Inquiring minds want to know! We live in a culture  that  loves to compare themselves to others – which of course, often leads us to think we are better than or worse  than those we are comparing ourselves to.  This is not usually a productive  thing to do, but  most of us do it.  It can be particularly unproductive – and dangerous – to do that  regarding addiction. Think :  What  are the characteristics most people think of when you ask them to describe an alcoholic ?   They give descriptions such as:

Drinks  in the morning

Drinks all day  and/or all night, drunk ‘24-7’

Can’t hold down a job

Poor hygiene and grooming

Doesn’t eat healthfully

Severe health problems, bad teeth

Often homeless

A ‘bum’

Panhandles for change  or returns  pop bottles , but spends the money on  more booze

 

And most people  who secretly wonder if they have a problem with alcohol, will look at a list  like that and decide immediately that they aren’t that bad! Therefore, they conclude,  they decide that they are not alcoholic and do not have a problem.  It must be something else, right? 

 

But did you know that  alcohol  addiction develops in  three distinct stages? The symptoms  I just  listed are  the ones found in the  late stage of addiction. This stage is so obvious that a high school  student could diagnose it correctly.  However, there are two stages  that happen before the late stage.

 

The middle stage  is the stage where alcohol-related problems  worsen -  they become more obvious than the first stage, and a little harder to hide as time goes on.  Job attendance / performance problems crop up more often here. Relationship issues develop, and oftentimes, the partner in the relationship pinpoints that the alcohol use is becoming a problem. Promises to  cut down  or control use  are made, perhaps even kept for awhile, but  eventually broken again. Tolerance -the brain’s ability to function in spite of increasing amounts of alcohol- increases. Loss of control worsens here in this stage – one drink turns into too many,  and promises to ‘behave’ oneself get made – and broken – with more  regularity than in the first stage.  Obsession  deepens. The drink (and the desirable effects from it)  is  more often the first thing on the drinker’s mind. The relationship with alcohol is deepening.  Health problems start cropping up in this stage – elevated liver enzymes,  ulcers  begin (or worsen), high blood pressure, high cholesterol, heart disease, strokes, dental problems,  gastric problems  all can show up in this stage.  Legal issues are  common as well- one or more DWI’s,  police involvement in domestic violence incidences, disorderly conduct and harassment charges, bar fights. Finances sharply worsen in this stage, partly because of the cost of increased alcohol consumption,  partly because of  time lost  at the job, or even getting laid off or fired, and partly because of the cost of  legal entanglements (court fines, lawyers, DWI  -related costs and fines.)  The first try at getting help often happens in this stage. And yet, the drinking  often  resumes or continues.

 

The first stage is the  hardest to diagnose. This is the stage where the signs  can be rather subtle. It looks like it might be any other problem but alcohol that’s causing disruption in the drinker’s life.  The  drinker  has realized that alcohol makes him or her feel better. And  he or she begins to look forward to it more often.  Anticipation begins here. The drinker  begins making room for more opportunities to drink.  He or she  finds more reasons to enjoy a few drinks. Getting that first drink down a little faster  often starts here. There may be some loss of control that  begins, although it can be sporadic. Sometimes  he can stop at just one or two, other times, he  gets intoxicated without intending to.  Tolerance begins. One DWI  can happen to anyone - people make mistakes in judgment now and then. Alcohol impairs that part of the brain that makes decisions!!!  And most people who don’t have a budding alcohol problem learn from their mistake and don’t repeat it.  But a second DWI  is almost certainly a sign that alcoholism has begun. And yet, if you were to tell this person  that they may have alcoholism starting, they  often picture in their mind  that homeless bum drunk, stumbling thru town, and  he or she may say, “No way! I’m not that bad!” The very denial that everyone can see in the late-stage alcoholic is already beginning here, almost under the radar.

 

Let me say right here, that alcoholism is  a disease. It is  NOT willful misconduct. It’s NOT  a bad personality. Alcoholism can produce  rebellious behavior, or cause rebelliousness to worsen,  but  it is still a disease.  It is  treatable, and the earlier it is  treated, the better the outcome. The best thing  you can do if you have this problem is to tell yourself the truth -  I have a problem- it’s my drinking. The best thing you can do for someone you care about who may have this problem is to tell yourself the truth -  my loved one has a problem- it’s the drinking. Once you make that courageous statement, you have pulled away the curtain of denial, and God can begin helping you. See you next week  for more about God wanting to help!

 

Love,

Pastor Judy

 

 

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God Wants to Help Me?  2/14/12

 

If you are reading this article, friend, I believe it is because God led you here to read it. There are no coincidences in God’s world. Things happen for a reason. It’s my hope and prayer that you will feel touched by God’s love as you read this week’s article. There is something He wants to say to you, if you are willing to listen.

 

You know, it was never God’s plan for his children to get themselves tangled up in addiction of any kind. But God in His great wisdom gave us free will –to choose how we will live and who, if anyone, we will listen to. He was hoping we would choose to follow Him, because He loves us so! Friends, God’s love for us is so deep, and so tender that He wanted us to love him and follow Him because we want to, not because we have to. So He gave the choice to us.

 

God understands us- that we are weak, we make mistakes, we don’t like to listen, we wander away from Him and His ways, and we want to do things our way. He also knows that our way often leads to major trouble for us. In our rebellion, many of us thought we had outsmarted life when we found alcohol and drugs and other addictive behaviors. So, we partied, or we hid, we did as we pleased, and we drank or we drugged or gambled or any other addictive behavior as often as we could. Our lives began to unravel. Things went south – sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly, but they always went south as we continued in our addictive patterns.

 

This problem is not new to God. His chosen people, the Israelites, were pretty rebellious and stubborn, too. They had gotten themselves in so much trouble! But God never stopped loving them, never stopped trying to help them come back to Him.

 

In the Bible is a book, written by a prophet named Isaiah, and in Chapter 1, verses 18-19, God says through Isaiah:

 

“Come now, let us reason together,” says the LORD. “Though your sins are like
scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool. If you are willing and obedient, you will eat the best from the land;”

 

God was promising the Israelites that if they will put their trust in Him and follow His ways, He would heal them from their troubled lives, and they would experience blessings.

 

There’s another book of the Bible that was written by another prophet, this one named Jeremiah. God said through him in Chapter 29, verses 11 thru 13:

 

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.”

 

God was saying that this mess is not all there is to life. God has a plan! And it’s a good one! And it included giving them hope and a future. All He was asking of them is that they seek him out. Come looking for Him. Pray to Him. And put their whole heart into it.

 

I don’t know about you, but I like to make things personal, especially when I read about something God says in the Bible. Friend,let’s do that. Let’s make what God
said personal.   He wants to talk with you, reason things out with you. He’s asking you to let Him help you clean up your life of the troubles and fears and problems caused by addiction. And He’s promising blessing in your life if you let Him in and turn to Him. And He’s saying that this mess is not all there is – HE has a much better plan for your life. God is hoping you want to come and talk to Him about that plan. And He has promised to listen! All He is asking is that we come to Him with
all our heart in it.

 

I guess it all comes down to what we are willing to believe, right? I mean, you could continue to believe whatever it is the drug or the drink or the addiction is telling you. It’s your choice. Or you could possibly, just maybe, believe what the King of the Universe is promising you.  The choice is yours. See you next week!

 

Love,

Pastor Judy

 

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          4-Way Damage    February 20,2012

 

 

Addiction is a 4-fold disease. It affects its victims in 4 ways – physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. The physical damage addiction causes is relative to whatever the drug is (alcohol is a drug, too!) , and its specific properties and action
on brain cells and body tissue. Opiates can actually cause permanent changes in the part of the brain that acknowledges and measures how severe pain is. Marijuana increases heart rate and causes arrhythmias. Frequent, prolonged use deposits more and more of the active ingredient, THC – a tar-like substance- on the lungs, the brain, the ovaries in females, and the testes in males.  Alcohol abuse affects every major organ in the human body, and withdrawal from alcohol can be fatal. Withdrawal from opiates is not fatal– it can just make the addicted person wish they could die. In short, there is no ‘free lunch’ – there is no drug addiction without a physical price tag.

 

Addiction is a mental disease. Not only can it trigger depression, anxiety, and in some cases, psychosis,  addiction also changes the way a person thinks and processes the meaning of daily life events. Addiction hijacks one’s value system and reorders priorities. When a person is suffering from addiction, the drug slowly or quickly becomes the most important thing in that person’s life. More and more time and mental focus are invested in getting the drug (or drink!), enjoying the high,coping with consequences (often poorly) , and going back for more despite those consequences. The drug becomes the top priority. Regardless of other needs and necessities on the to-do list of daily life, the drug becomes Number One. A good example of this is addiction to Nicotine. Ask any moderate to heavy smoker, and most will tell you they work hard to never run out. Wherever they go, they make sure they have their ‘smokes’ with them and can take periodic breaks to smoke.

 

Addiction is a disease of the emotions.   Like one’s priorities, addiction hijacks one’s emotions as well, and protecting the drug and the drug use is the new priority. So, a person who is in the early stage of addiction to alcohol may become defensive and angry if someone voices concern about their drinking, or drinking behavior. As addiction progresses and deepens, the addicted person may start blaming others for their behavior, justifying their actions and continued use, denying the reality of their problems,  and eventually just plain shutting down their emotions – going ‘numb’; unable to feel the normal range of mad, sad, glad, or fear that is a part of daily life for most everyone else.

 

Lastly, addiction is a spiritual disease. All around us is the knowledge of God’s existence. The Apostle Paul wrote that in a letter to the Roman Christians, that is part of the Bible now. In Chapter 1, verse 20, Paul wrote that "Since the creation of the world, God’s invisible qualities – his eternal power and divine nature – have been clearly seen, being understood from what has been made," ( all of creation! ) "so that people have no excuse."   But addiction hijacks our spirit as well as our body, mind and emotions. As addiction progresses, there is less and less room for anything other than the drink or other drug. There is also less and less room for God, and for anything else to do with faith. That’s because the addiction is moving into First Place. Remember the Easter time movie that airs every year about Moses and the 10 Commandments? Remember what the first 3 commandments are?

1. I am the Lord your God. 

2. You shall have no other gods before Me. 

3. You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in the heaven
above, or on the earth beneath, or in the waters below. You shall not bow down to them or worship them.

 

I do believe the damage done by addiction fits those passages. As one’s commitment to the drug deepens, God, or any idea of God ,or acknowledgement that He exists, or any commitment to faith, gets pushed aside. The addiction demands center stage.   Whenever we put something ahead of God, whose rightful place is First Place in our hearts, we are worshipping something other than Him. We have given our hearts over to the drug, not to God.  As verse 25 of Romans Chapter 1 states, “They exchanged the truth about God for a lie. ”

 

The truth about God is, this is not how He wants us to live, all tangled up in and confused by and hurt from our addiction. But in order for Him to begin healing us, we need to embrace truth – HIS truth.There can only be one ultimate leader in anything – a family, a corporation, a military brigade, a sports team – and in life. God says He is our leader, if we will listen to Him. The addiction says “No way! I’m your boss!!! ” 

 

But God’s word is stronger than the lie of addiction. God says in a book of the Bible named Jeremiah, Chapter 29, verse 13, that we will find Him when we seek Him with all our heart. That means if we have a change of heart, and desire to put Him in First Place where He belongs in our heart, then we will find him, and He will listen to us and help us.  Now that’s a promise you can count on! God never lies! See you next week!

 

Love,

Pastor Judy

 

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2/28/12 

In the Bible, the gospel of John, who was one of Jesus’ disciples, tells of how Jesus went to a well-known pool in Jerusalem called Bethesda. Many crippled, sick,and blind people were there – indeed, they were there every day. The Jews believed that this pool was stirred up by an angel every so often, and would bring healing and restoration to the first person who managed to get into the water.  So, hurting and sick people gathered there daily, waiting, waiting, hoping they might get their chance to be healed, maybe this time, maybe today, if they could just be the first into the water when it moved.

 

There was a man there who had been sick for 38 years- 38 YEARS! Jesus asked him, “Do you want to be made well?” And the man, not knowing that it was Jesus he was talking to, answered that he had no one to help him into the water, and when he tries to get himself in the water, somebody else always hops in ahead of him. Jesus said to him, “Get up, take up your mat and walk!”   And the man did! Can you imagine the shock and then disbelief and then utter joy as the man became instantly strong enough to stand and then walk? After 38 years of being too sick to do so?

 

The only reason this happened is, Jesus is who He said He is: the Son of God. He has the power to overcome those situations and conditions that overcome people. It was clear to that fellow and it’s clear to us the readers, that that fellow could do nothing to heal himself. His best efforts still weren’t enough. He needed Jesus’ help.

 

Recovery from addiction is like that. We must first acknowledge that there is a serious problem with our drinking, drug use, tobacco use, gambling, porn, whatever it is…. And that it’s bigger than we can handle on our own. That’s a tough piece of honesty to chew and digest. No one likes to admit they failed.But as long as we think we can handle things, or tell ourselves that things aren’t that bad yet, or that it doesn’t bother us that we are hurting and sick, we won’t receive the real help that we do need. Jesus is polite. If we don ‘t ask, He doesn’t barge in uninvited.

 

If you notice, Jesus even asked the man, “Do you want to be made well?" There’s so much hanging in the balance in that question!   The desire to be helped and healed must be there or the help cannot be had. Honesty, too, must be a part of getting help or it doesn’t work. How can Jesus help a man who won’t be honest about his need?   There is also a measure of responsibility involved in receiving healing. That man, once healed of his sickness, would have to stop begging and start earning a living.He would be expected to become an active, contributing member of the Jewish
community.  It’s an important question that Jesus asked him.

 

So, please allow me to ask you, the reader, the same important question. Do you want to be made well? Do you believe you have an addiction problem that you cannot fix on your own? Do you want help and healing? Are you willing to take responsibility for your life and your choices?

 

To my Christian reader: Maybe you have learned your bible cover-to-cover. But if you are locked in mortal combat with an addiction, it’s a battle for your very life. And it is not only a physical battle ,it is a spiritual battle- a battle for your soul. Hebrews 4:12 reads: “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged
sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.” Let your Bible speak to your heart – deep, deep honesty. Jesus’ peace, and guidance, and strength can be yours – if you will enter into a real, heart-to-heart relationship with Him. And simply knowing your bible does
no good whatsoever unless you put it into practice.   James 1:22 states: “Do
not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.” And

verse 27 states:   “Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: …to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.”

 

It’s a safe guess that if you have gotten trapped by an addiction, you have been polluted by the world. Remember from last week’s article - addiction is a form of idolatry. Addiction is not from God, my friend. It’s demonic and meant to destroy you.

 

To my other readers: Maybe you have never picked up a bible in your life. Perhaps you have never set foot in a church before. Or maybe you did, but found it not to your liking and never went back or tried another. Maybe you have no clear understanding of what it means to be a born-again Christian. Or you have run  into people who seemed fanatical, pushy, and even odd-for-God, and decided that if this is Christianity,they can keep it. So, feeling justified, perhaps you closed the door on faith and things of God and never looked back. But here you are, some time later, hurting and in misery from your addiction. Something has to change or the damage will continue.

 

To both groups of readers, we have to let go of pride – that part of you that is convinced you can handle it, that things aren’t that bad. Let it go. Reach for Jesus – for His Hand as He is reaching out for yours.Call out His Name and ask Him to  help you break free of this trap you are in. Ask Him to forgive you for the decisions you have made that have landed you where you are. Ask Him to break the hold your addiction has on you, in whatever way He thinks is best. Ask Him to help you follow Him.

 

The Apostle John wrote a letter to some Christians after Jesus went back to
heaven. Here’s what he said about God’s love and plan for us :





 

“This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that
he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.”   That’s in 1 John, Chapter 4, verses 9 & 10.

 

Friend, that means that God loves us. He didn’t wait till we loved him before helping us , he sent help first. And that help was his Son , Jesus, who paid for all of our sins. We’ll talk more in future articles about what it means for us that Jesus paid for all
of our sins. But for now, I want you to know that God sees your hurt, your pain, and your struggle. And he has already made preparation for you to get help.Jesus is the Son of the Living God, who desires to help you live a life that will bring you joy and bring Him honor. Do you want to be made well? It’s an important question that Jesus is asking you. How will you answer?

 

See you next week!

 

Love,

Pastor Judy

 

 

 

Responses to this column are welcome at Facebook:

 

 

 

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